The Scoop on Mascaras and Eyelashes

I've had a bit too much of the DD lately and so I thought I'd branch out into (or is that return to?) the living-with-our-illnesses-more-easily field.  As I've always said, we are not just our illnesses, the CFIDS/ME/CFS and/or fibromyalgia. 

And so I thought I'd do a few posts that contain helpful makeup tips. 

The holidays REALLY are the time of the year when we want to shine, as sparkles are all around us.   Furthermore, as we venture out for get-togethers, we run into friends and family we've not seen in a while.  We just want to look human, or presentable, for that matter.  With smartphones and large cameras with zoom lenses, pictures of ourselves will be taken on purpose or surreptitiously, thus further making us want to look our best, knowing the photography of today will show up each and every pore and wrinkle.  (I know: what a dilemma.  Look good and have have everyone say "you look great: you don't look sick," or go out looking like death warmed over!)

With that in mind, I thought that today I'd give a run-down on mascaras.

I'm not sure that there IS any mascara out there that doesn't cause my eyes to become at least a tiny bit red. However, most mascaras make my eyes very red, embarrassingly so since salespeople have actually asked me why my eyes are so red, assuming I'd been crying.   Sweet people, but nonetheless embarrassing.  The redness, of course, is a legacy of the dry eyes (and mouth) we who live with CFIDS/ME/CFS and fibromyalgia are prone to, in spades.

For years and years I've been on a hunt, to find a mascara that doesn't cause red eyes.  I can't say that I've been completely successful, but I do have a few mascaras which I've found to be pretty successful.  From my massive collection (you really don't want to see how big - it HAS been a quest) I've focused on finding mascaras which fit the following criteria:

1.  Easy to apply (hand shakes, eyesight not the most reliable!)
2. The formula must be volumizing - because of the hair scarcity problem those of us with the DD put up with (if your brows are thin, chances are that so too are your eyelashes.)
3. Have good staying power
4. Keep your eyes from turning red!!! (I mean, look at those freaky old pictures with red eyes that look like...well, I shudder to say what!).

I exclude water-proof mascara because they make eyes really red and end up hurting them for days afterwards.

So, here are my favorite five, saving the best for last:

• Bare Minerals Flawless Definition Volumizing Mascara: shocker, as I thought that the company was only good for the powders. Easy to apply and no red eye.
• Estée Lauder "Sumptuous" Bold Volume Lifting Mascara: A real surprise! There were samples in various makeup deals/collections and I thought that I'd end up throwing the samples away.  Well, I'll be derned... It works REALLY well.
• DiorShow Mascara:  Best in show in many "top lists," this was the first time I realized that you CAN have it all in one mascara!
• Clinique Bottom Lash Mascara: When my hands aren't too steady, for some reason I find I have better control with this mascara designed for your lower lashes. Yes, this mascara works well on the tiny lower lashes but it also works well on the tiny upper lashes.  However, I'll use this mascara on my entire upper lashes if I find that otherwise I'll be poking the mascara into my eyeball.  I also love the little tube - perfect for travel and emergency handbag kits as well.
• Blinc Mascara ("Stop painting your lashes...TUBE them!"): I'm absolutely in love with this mascara. It doesn't budge after putting it on and I usually forget it's there - and isn't that the holy grail? - that you don't feel made up?  Furthermore, Blinc comes off quite easily when you want to wash it off: just a warm washcloth pressed on the eyes for a moment and the little tubes around each lash slide right off onto your washcloth.  Amazing!

There you go. I'll still be on the hunt for the perfect mascara, but these fill my needs pretty well.  Do you have any mascara you swear by?  Have you given up on mascara?  I'll wear eyeliner alone when my eyes/lashes are extra sensitive since the liner IS an improvement on the invisible eyes.  Let us know.

Finally, have you tried going the tinting of eyelashes route?  What do you think of it?  It's my favorite way to go because the tint is fantastic for about four to six weeks.  When I wear mascara and liner after tinting, my eyes pop.  The lashes also seem to get much added volume, having been plumped up by the tinting.  And it's marvelous that with tinting I don't scare little children, nor grown men if I happen to go out without my eyes done.  Now I just need to find someone locally to tint the lashes - it's great not to worry about doing my eyes when I'm in bed, unable to do anything.  We need to hold onto our dignity and self-esteem as much as possible.  Reactions?

At any rate, I hope everyone's doing their best, only better. Ciao and paka!

Just For Fun...

My incredible workhorse, Temperley's Elemis Safari Traveler, on board

                        

One of my favorite beauty lines is the luxury British brand, Elemis.  Yes, it is rather pricey (ahem) but I've found that for the most part, using the much more affordable brands all too often wreak havoc with my CFIDS/ME and fibromyalgia funky skin, so much so that hubby begs me to stop trying to save money in this one area, skincare, as well as makeup. Yes, this is yet another example of one of what I call "the hidden costs" of CFIDS/etc.  Others include, though are not limited to, trying to find help for the dozens of jobs you can no longer do yourself, like cook or clean, cut the grass, pick up your meds, go to the store for anything whatsoever.  But I digress.

I finally broke down and made my first Elemis purchase when my absolutely favorite blogger, Ruth-the-model (versus my absolutely other favorite blogger, my dear Internet ME daughter, Ruth-the-Cambridge-student, as the two Ruths are known in this house) showed the readers/viewers of her blog and video a treasure which Alice Temperley, the hot current British designer Ruth-the-model had introduced.  Being an American, I'd never heard of this British designer who'd created such a wonderful beauty products bag for Elemis, filled of course, with a few Elemis products.  After much hemming and hawing, I finally broke down and bought it.

Little did I realize that shortly thereafter I'd be going to Kuala Lumpur, during which one of my four (!) flights going TO KL was canceled, causing me to spend the night in an airport hotel and thus causing me to arrive in KL one and a half days late.  But that gorgeous, very convenient and well-designed bag was by my side going there, while there, and coming home.  It was even with me as I took a luxurious shower during a long layover in an immaculate lounge in the famous Singapore airport - words I never thought I'd ever write, much less actually do, on so many levels.  Flying halfway around the world?  Asia?  Using a public toilet, much less a "public" shower?  I swear that airport was so incredible that I'm almost ready to make plans to fly to Singapore just for the airport experience alone!   It was just that incredible. Amazing.

The Elemis products which came with the bag truly are some of my favorites.  I seriously doubt that I'll ever be able to find another bath treatment better than the "Skin Nourishing Milk Bath."   (Cleopatra, with all due respect, eat your heart out!)  After a good soak with the milk formula in the bathwater, I find any areas of my body which might be dry, and even the occasional "chicken skin," vanish.  (Lovely pictures I describe of myself, no?)  I'm saving up my pennies (dollars!) for another purchase and need to do so soon, especially with this latest complication of the hypothyroidism and the out-the-wazoo dehydrated skin. 

The facial cleanser, "Pro-Radiance Cream Cleanser," works like a charm and I've had very good results with it.  It DOES have a bit of a sting to it and once hubby was almost paralyzed with fear when he happened upon me doing a facial DIY in the tub and caught a look at my face.  He warned me that it was very red, but by the time I'd finished up and looked in the mirror, all redness was gone and I was very happy with the results, as always.

The moisturizer, "Pro-Collagen Marine Cream" I reviewed here.  And YES!  I now remember that's the one which was so successful this past weekend, which I couldn't remember in yesterday's post.  (Darn those slow neuro-transmitters!) 

One last aside which will (eventually!) come back to the discussion at hand: "Project Runway" is our guilty pleasure. Hubby has rarely been able to resist any sort of competition and so when I started watching it, he joined me in order to spend a relaxing hour together.  However, he made me SWEAR that I'd never tell a soul that he watches the show and I honored that pledge.  Let's just say that hubby hates to wear anything that looks nice on him and rarely am I not embarrassed being by his side, purely clothes-wise, I hasten to add.  Oh, he cleans up very well when he wants to, but normally he likes to dress with the most atrocious things he can find.  I think he actually enjoys frustrating me and considers it part of his "identity."  (He actually thinks this part is very funny!)

At any rate, after a few seasons of watching "PR" - the things that would start coming out of his mouth!  He now talks about proportion, loudly and proudly, and often chides those who pick out a fabric which will be a mistake, gets frustrated when a designer makes a huge error with a feature that "does the model no favors," (parroting Michael Kors' words, I believe?), is exasperated when a designer constantly repeats the same errors or does not "grow" and often accurately predicts the winner well ahead of time.  Again, the things that come out of his mouth are incredible!  Who knew he had this talent? 

But when Mondo lost a couple of seasons ago, hubby was so upset that he went around saying "Mondo was robbed!" to just about everyone he came in contact with, be it lawyers, truck drivers, teachers, it mattered not who it was, nor if they'd even seen or heard of the show - or cared!   Well, after that, I was released from my promise of no disclosure. And after all this time, he's still upset about Mondo - and still quite vocal about it.

So imagine the hooting and hollerin' (by moi) that went on when Alice Temperley was a guest host on "Project Runway" recently.  I was so excited that I was "in the know," as I commented on Ruth-the-model's blog, just yesterday.  It was just plain fun watching this designer's opinions - and thankfully liking what I heard.

Yes, indeedy, hubby and I get our jollies wherever we can, within reason.  (Eye roll!)

But if you want to try out a really fantastic line, I don't think you can go wrong with Elemis.  And if you can afford the Temperley Safari bag, you may want to treat yourself and go for it - it's right up there with one of my best and most successful purchases ever.  (For purchase, it's available at Bliss.)

And if you want a really great beauty blog to read, Ruth-the-model's blog, A Model Recommends is a lot of fun, filled with humor, insight and insider information. 

Do you have a favorite "luxury" purchase you treated yourself to and are still delighted that you made that difficult decision, be it beauty-related, to anything at all, even a lamp tucked away in a favorite nook in your house?  I'd love to hear about it, especially as I know how difficult decision-making is for the CFIDS/ME and fibro person - or anyone else for that matter!

In the meantime, I hope all are doing the best they can be, only better.  (I embrace my fibro-logic!)  Ciao and paka!

Dry Skin: The Tip of the Iceberg?

Desperate times call for desperate measures: using a hydrating mask yesterday before the dehydration numbers came in from my blood work.

Well, it seems that I've sort of lost yet another body part, or more accurately, the functionality of it.

Three weeks ago, in order to help out over-worked hubby, it was my daughter who took me to my monthly mandatory visit to my GP.  Well, THAT was a bit of a stunner.  My daughter, a teacher, put on that special ed teacher hat of hers, the one I don't normally see in full action, and in a very gentle manner, basically urged, prodded and forced me to explain all the concerns I've been experiencing since about spring, almost a year and a half ago by now.  Who knew she could be this person?

I've KNOWN that there is something new that is majorly wrong with me - and have, at times, complained about it loudly, other times not bothering to at all since I too often feel that no one is listening.  But what I do realize is that my daughter has a finely tuned antenna for the things that go on with me, amazingly so.  Anyway, this "major new hugely bad problem" happens every few years - with the time my body stopped producing Human Growth Hormone as one prime example.  So, blood tests were ordered (at my daughter's gentle but firm insistence to do it now in order to just get the ball rolling) and yesterday I got one set of results: I have developed hypothyroidism.  Furthermore, the other "bad numbers" that came in gel with hypothyroidism.

In talking to my doctor, he brought up a good question: how can I fix you if you can't tell me what it is?  Fibro-brain at its best on my part.  Good point on his.  However, since that visit I've amassed a list of at least 12 new strange things, things I'd mutter under my breath without realizing it ad hubby hearing it.  A few are explained by the hypothyroidism (more on that in a future post) 

This news is not surprising since the tricky part in the past year and a half has been that there are so many symptoms which overlap with CFIDS/ME and hypothyroidism, with a short account on that in days to come.  To demonstrate how tricky some of these diagnoses are, I thought I'd jot down a "few" of the symptoms (ha!) which I found on sites from the Mayo Clinic, WebMD and others:

• Coarse and thinning hair. (check: for thinning!)
• Dry skin. (check: to be discussed in a later post)
• Brittle nails.  (check: incredibly so)
• A yellowish tint to the skin. (check: comes and goes but so much lately that I've actually tried bleaching my palms!!!)
• Slow body movements. (check)
• Cold skin (check: but more later)
• Increased inability to tolerate cold. (hey: why don't I have that?  Oh yeah I do, I simply forgot how often I've been changing the thermostat each day lately)
• Memory problems (duh? And see above)
• Problems concentrating (check!)
• Feeling tired, sluggish, or weak. (Super, super, super check, aka "SSSC")
• Constipation  (no comment)

To continue, I also read that "other, less common symptoms" may include:

• Modest weight gain, unexplained weight gain 10 lb (4.5 kg) or less. (check: future post)
• Swelling of the arms, hands, legs, and feet (check: eye roll) 
• Peripheral neuropathy (check: it got better but recently moved to new areas)
• Facial puffiness, particularly around the eyes. (you have noooo idea how bad lately)
• Hoarseness. (ditto: almost never talk w/out hoarseness now)
• Muscle aches and cramps. (really?)
• Pale, dry skin (oy!)
• An elevated blood cholesterol level (ay!)
• Muscle aches, tenderness and stiffness (aha!)
• Pain, stiffness or swelling in your joints (hmmm...of course!)
• Muscle weakness (it's all in my head, right?)
• Food unappetizing, no taste (yes...I'm gonna cry!)
• Sadness or depression

I loved the depression part as I have that psychiatric wastebasket bugaboo, being a veteran of the DD war and thus scarred from the early years when my CFIDS/ME and fibro were unknown and later when NO one out there believed.  We are not only our "mother's daughters" - as I've so often said - but we are also products of our generation and my generation of CFIDS/ME and fibromyalgia was treated as shabbily as the suffragettes who had the audacity to want to vote and were all too often considered mentally ill for such outrageously blasphemous thinking.

I will start taking the thyroid medication and it'll take a month or two to kick in and we will see what happens. Hopefully, once the thyroid levels become normal, the cholesterol count of 355 will come down, the triglycerides, glucose levels will go to more normal levels and the latest puzzle of why my skin is so dry, with very little helping to remedy the situation, my eyes dry as well, to the point of being almost unbearably painful, will be answered.

You can bet that I will be coming back to this topic.  It's important to keep in mind that it's dangerous to keep blaming EVERYTHING on the DD.  Just because you have CFIDS/ME and fibromyalgia doesn't mean that you get a pass for other illnesses developing - even cancer.  In fact, because of our wacky immunological and neurological dysfunctional, compromised and impaired systems, I would venture to think that we are at an added risk for just about everything across the board.

I know that the hypothyroidism is not the answer to what I'm calling, "the big new seriously bad thing that is happening" problem.  But at least we have a good start!  (And yes, I realize that was yet another sentence fragment.)

At any rate, here's to everyone feeling the best they can be, only better!

Finally, a reminder that tomorrow is the drawing for the Skyn Iceland kit.  You know the spiel by now.  There's still time to join and enter. Just think: those who've signed up and left a post here have perhaps the biggest chance in the world of winning something EVER!   Again, it just staggers the mind!

Caio and paka!  (Hmmm....I think I like that Italian and Russian mix for "good bye" and "till next time.")

Beauty and the Repair Complex

I think I need a good few days away from all things CFIDS/ME/fibro, away from the inadequacies, the stress, the pain, the angst. (I like that last word, "angst." It says so much, though a bit melodramatically?)

Instead, I'd like to go to the "beauty world" part of my life: it's August and it's HOT, HOT, HOT. That means "miserable."   Why is it, I often wonder, that despite my not going outside, I am STILL affected by the weather?   Perhaps barometric changes influence?   I have no idea.

But what I do know is that not too long ago (smooth but awfully corny transition!) I bought a couple of Esteé Lauder promotional products.  I'm not sure why I've never been even slightly interested in Estée Lauder.   When in high school, I had a neighbor who worked the cosmetics counter at our local department store and perhaps I somehow associated the EL line with Bebe, who, bless her heart, would slip me a sample of this or that every once in a while, along with a few much-needed tips that high school girls want (and desperately crave!).  

At any rate, in both promotional packages, I found that there were tiny little bottles of EL's Advanced Night Repair Synchronized Recovery Complex, a product in a brown glass bottle that I've never even given a second glance.  Was I disappointed to find those samples?  You betcha!   But after a couple of weeks I was in one of those "let's play girl" moods (my BP must have been up to almost normal if I was up for games) and so I smeared a bit of it onto my face.  When I woke up (who knows if it was day or night - it was SLEEP!) I happened to brush my hand across my face and was absolutely surprised to find that my skin felt so much softer and definitely more finely textured than it had been in quite some time.  Having so little short-term memory, it took me a while to remember why my face felt so much nicer and then looked "healthier" in the mirror.  Surprise!   It was the Night Repair.   I liked this product so much that I ended up buying a bottle of it and refilling one of the sample-sized bottle to take with me on my madcap adventure to Kuala Lumpur.

I was further surprised to find out that the serum is a "classic," and a real workhorse, known for its reliability.  Yet another surprise for me! 

And it is quite a good serum.  I like that there is hyaluronic acid in it, the acid I wrote about in an earlier post (see here). Hyaluronic acid is a naturally-occurring substance which we start producing less of as we age (of course - all the good stuff goes!).  It holds water in the uppermost layers of your skin so when you apply a beauty product which contains hyaluronic acid onto your face, you're capturing the moisture and keeping it there.  It's essentially a water magnet.  It's also hugely effective as a healing agent.  The stuff just keeps sounding better and better.

There is much more mumbo jumbo about it, "scientific" stuff that EL is throwing around, just like every other skincare and beauty company out there.  Who knows how much is hype and how much is truth, my skewed opinion, honestly, in everything with the beauty industry.  Add in the "what works for one may not work for another" and then the "consistency" problem - there is no way on God's green earth that I'm going to be able to carry off using any product every day - and you have a very skeptical customer.  So, I basically go by the old standard of, "does it work for me?"  

And then today, as I started to do some preliminary research on the serum, I discovered that there is reportedly a bit of silicone in it.  I didn't find that whatever silicone is in it affected me negatively and I'm not sure if the reason the silicone not disturbing my skin is because of the formulation or if it's because I don't use it every night, just on nights I don't use my other products.
  
Ah yes, I happen to like to change my beauty products, unlike most sane people out there I suppose, because I work on the "shampoo principle."  

"And what is the 'shampoo principle'?" you many ask?  

Well, back in high school we were always told that you needed to switch your shampoo around because your hair gets "used" to a product and changing brands occasionally helps move things around.  Now I have no idea if this is true, or was ever true or true back in the day: lots has changed since I was in high school.  And you may very well ask, by WHOM pray tell, were we given this advice?  Warning: don't choke!  Take whatever you're drinking away from your mouth or you run the risk of spraying water onto your computer monitor when I tell you and spraying water out of mouth is a decidedly uncouth thing to do.

Ready?  I think it was the nuns at my one wonderful year at a Catholic boarding school - nuns who were very dedicated to making "ladies" out of us, and "Southern Ladies" at that! - who taught us that bit of news.  (Yes, they WERE women before becoming nuns, rumor has it!)  

At any rate, that bit of "wisdom" has stayed with me.  And to be fair to those beloved nuns who taught us that, I find that it works!   So, having put all these pro's and con's together, I must say that I really like the serum and will be using it for quite some time, although I know I'll keep on switching things around, experimenting. 

Yes, it's a bummer getting older.  I realized that not only do I need to get rid of the hyperpigmentation (age spots) that is appearing at an alarming rate, but that I also need to try to detour the wrinkles coming along and get the dehydration out of the way.  Yes, dehydration, one of the hallmarks of CFIDS/ME/fibro: all three chronic illnesses.  So, for that alone, the night repair is staying in my skincare drawer.  

Do you have a favorite product or beauty routine that you picked up quite by accident and are not sure how or why you continue to do so?   I'd love to hear it.

In the meanwhile, I hope everyone's feeling as best as can be, only better!  Till next time!


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Fighting dehydrated skin (especially on long-haul flights)...

I've been scouring the Internet in order to find or put together some magical formula as to what I should pack for my trip to Kuala Lumpur (KL) and when I forget that I'm trying to find beauty tips in order to do a long-haul flight, it's actually been a lot of fun.  I mean, I can read beauty "stuff" all day long (and often do!).  It's only when I remember that I'm not looking for theoretical information, that I actually have a mission to accomplish, that my stomach goes all topsy turvy, with more than a little bit of anxiety thrown in.

And with this trip, I have the usual worries with an added factor, which is, actually, NOT so minor: it's the first time I'll be flying alone in at least 15 years and I'll have to be wheel chaired from one airline to another - twice! - going there as well as coming back - and in huge airports.  To make things a bit more disconcerting, I feel that I'm at a huge disadvantage not knowing the languages involved.  No, I don't speak Italian, Spanish, German, nor even Greek for that matter, but Asian languages are a whole different ball game for me.  I know that English is spoken "everywhere" there are tourists, but it's still an unsettling feeling - though I'm certainly trying to turn it into an adventure.

At any rate, I thought I'd pass on a few of the tidbits I've run into that I have found interesting, for one reason or another:

• Dry skin vs. Dehydrated skin:

I've felt for the longest time that I didn't really have dry skin, but I've never really been able to put my finger on what else it could be when, in the grand scheme of things, I have so many bigger problems: like trying to figure out my whole sleep mess.  But I've always felt awkward saying that I have "dry skin."  Even saying "combination skin" somehow made me feel like an impostor.  I wasn't sure what I had, though I certainly knew I had sensitive skin of some sort, but what else?  Then after a hospitalization a few years ago - with the Intensive Care Unit thrown in - my skin really turned on me and with my whole compartment syndrome hospitalization six months ago... that didn't exactly help matters either.

This wasn't flabby skin (though heaven knows I have more than I'd like of that) but skin that wasn't young and plump any longer.  To complicate matters, I happen to be one of those people who really, really does not like cream on my skin, other than on my face.  I've tried just about everything out there (or so it often seems to me) and have pretty much hated everything I've tried, save my Dove soap (OK! OK! "beauty bar"!  Sheesh!) and the LaMer Hand Treatment, which I use on any dry parts.  However, in the last few years, even my Dove and LaMer have not been of much help.  Out of desperation I've turned to other products, enduring them in hopes of their helping turn things around a bit, with not much luck.

• Hyaluronic acid:

I've been hearing about hyaluronic acid for a while now but somehow it never really clicked that I should give it a try, especially since it is great for dehydrated skin.  (I suppose because of my ongoing war with my pores!  How many battles can be fought at one time?)

But evidently hyaluronic acid, which is a naturally occurring substance in our body fluids, found in joints, for example - could be the answer, or a step in the right direction.  As we age we a) produce less and less of it and b) it gets broken down faster.  I've learned a ton of facts about it in the last few days, but the key factor here is that it locks in moisture.  If I go into the science of it all, we'll be here all night, so at this point I'll just say that I'm thrilled that I have made this discovery, especially since cabin air is so horribly drying.  I'd like to NOT look like I could easily pass for King Tutankhamen's only slightly younger sister when I get off the plane in KL.

• Clarins HydraQuench Intensive Serum Bi-phase:

Heavy on hyaluronic acid, I'm going to give this HydraQench serum a try, as well as the cream mask.

• Spritzing my face:

In my fight to stay as hydrated as possible, I'll hopefully be able to spritz my face with my Avene "water in a can" and/or my Omorovicza facial mist.  

The strange thing about this whole water problem is that in order to keep my blood pressure high enough, I need to eat a lot of salt.  Given how thirsty we who have CFIDS/ME/fibro are to begin with, the salt further complicates the whole dehydration issue.  Agh!!!!

At any rate, these are the newest weapons in the arsenal to fight against my crepe-y skin and thirsty skin issues. Hopefully, they'll work out nicely and not prove hubby right when he said, "shouldn't you have tested those things out before-hand?" followed by "what if you have an allergy to them?" 

Oh how I hate logic at times!  I'm trying to ignore him, though I'm giving them a try-out even as he goes off to bed, the smug little...killjoy. ;)

Answers Found in the Oddest Ways

The Original Clarence

Just after Thanksgiving, I had a freak accident which resulted in two surgeries for acute compartment syndrome and me almost losing my arm and hand, and indeed my life.  I'm still not completely sure what happened - though I DO know that it had to do with complications due to the CFIDS/ME/CFS and fibromyalgia - since  hubby and my daughter have found it almost impossible to discuss, much less fill in the blanks.

The first memory I have of the whole incident is well into the second week of December, though I'm told I wouldn't stop talking, and evidently spent a lot of time speaking in French, of all things - a language I don't even know, other than the tiny bit recalled from high school, eons ago - and when I still had a functioning brain.  Even back then I was not the most talented in my attempts at the language.

Over the last few years, I've often thought that my guardian angel needs a name, especially after so many near-misses with me, but this incident took the cake.  So he's now called "Clarence," the name of the angel-in-training in "It's a Wonderful Life."  Coincidence?  I'm not sure, but "Clarence" it is. This near-death experience included near-kidney failure, fluid around all of my organs, near pancreatitis (jury's still out on that one) and a 50-lb weight gain within just a few days from the massive fast-flowing IV's and numerous other complications of which I'm blissfully unaware. I ended up looking remarkedly like the Pillsbury Doughboy and moving about as successfully as the poor tyke.  Luckily things started to turn around once they gave me a couple of blood transfusions, something I really didn't particularly want since I had a near-death experience with that back in '79. But there was no choice, really. The timing was right for oh so many things, a sort of "perfect storm."

I'd had the flu since before the darn accident and though I normally run a fever a couple of times a day, this was way beyond even MY norm. At one point, out of desperation, I started squirting water on my face. Yes, I know there are those who make fun of paying good money for water-in-a-can but pouring water in a plastic bottle with no aerosol accomplishes nothing and since I really have so little carbon foot printing, I figured, I'm due a few points.

I had a few days when my eyes burned a lot and suddenly I realized it had been ages since my eyes were even mildly dry.  I couldn't figure out the reason, but I was happy since no amount of eye drops have ever helped.  My (old) eye doctor could never understand it and kept giving me tips, none of which worked, frustrating all.   I became almost an obsession, each doctor getting hung up on this tiny piece of minutiae in the grand scheme of things. I actually thought about trying the eye drops advertised on TV, usually during the evening news, but thought that the woman had really weird eyes...no thank you, I have enough problems.

But today I saw another person on that commercial and backed up my TV to hear her spiel. Well, actually I wanted to see how crazy HER eyes looked.  I'd hoped they'd tweaked the formula.  As I listened to the woman doctor talking, I heard a word which went "Ping!" in my brain.  She talked about the inflammatory process of the eye and why the eyes can become so dry.

BINGO!  I'd been describing my eyes as hard as marbles, which no amount of drops could penetrate. Well, that's what this product is, an anti-inflammatory going right to the spot.

I've been on an anti-inflammatory since my compartment syndrome surgeries. And all this time I've been forcing myself to drink a good amount of water, down from the usual gallon or more a day I normally crave, which drives hubby up the proverbial wall, with him "threatening" to set up a faucet above my bed. 
What kind of CFIDS'er and Fibro was I?  We all seem to walk around carrying water.  In the beginning, CFIDS and Fibro docs caught on quickly that those patients holding onto their water bottles for dear life were the ones who had CFIDS and/or fibro. They knew our diagnoses before even talking to us as they noticed our red eyes (from dryness), along with chapped lips, and the inside of our mouths sticking to our teeth, making any discussion that much harder.

In other words, my eyes were inflamed to the point where no amount of drops put into them could penetrate and do any good. The same with the dry mouth - so inflamed that the thirst was never quenched.  Now with the anti-inflammatory, it appears that the moisture is getting through. The red eyes seem to be disappearing. Lip balm is actually working. 

Yee-ha!  So, one puzzle out of how many hundreds has been answered?  Clarence, you old rascal, you did GOOD! ;)  Bring on that mascara!